PUCK YOU! Season 3, Episode 3.2: The Trade Deadline (repost)


While the 2012 NHL Lockout is underway, every Friday will be known as “Flashback Friday.” On this day of the week, a classic installment of PUCK YOU! will be released for your enjoyment.

Like Sean Avery said, "Sloppy Seconds."

This was originally published on Mar 8, 2012

Hello hockey fans! PUCK YOU! is back for part two of this three part series!

Note: This installment will be divided into three parts. The first was on, Tuesday March 6, and the third will follow on March 10th.

Our panelists include Bruce McGee, Al Creed, BaptisBlacktick, ThinkSoJoE, G, ThatDamnDoubleC, and Armchair MVP.




Captain Hook might disagree with the claim that a clock is not an important issue. Let’s see what the panel thinks…



Question 2: Since our last installment, we’ve seen a number of controversies in the NHL. In some regards, the media tends to blow things up because that’s what they get paid to do. Consider the following 4 cases. Which of these are relevant to you, and which are not, and why.
A). On February 2, 2012, the clock froze during a King’s and Blue Jackets match up. As a result, Drew Doughty notched a game winning goal to secure 2 points for his club in the standings. This caused an uproar by Columbus’ GM Scott Howson, who felt this technological gaffe cost his team the game.

Armchair MVP: Irrelevant. Other cases have now been shown where the clock stopped to recalibrate at completely innocent times. The controversy however is far more relevant than Scott Howson’s complaint. When you’re the Columbus GM, you should welcome anything that gives you a better shot at the number one pick, even if draft picks are gambles.

ThinkSoJoE: A). Obviously Howson has a legit gripe about this. How these things are even possible is beyond me, since, as far as I’m aware, there is a backup clock in the timekeeper booth. Not really sure what you can do about these kind of things though, timekeepers are human too.

BaptisBlacktick: CLOCK GATE:

What a bunch of shit luck Howson has had this season; not one thing has worked out for this poor bastard. From the signing and instant loss of James Wisnewski at the beginning of the season, the baby antics of Jeff Carter, the firing of the head coach, to the “Nash asked for it” trade speculations, he has had a bad year. Despite all these goof ups, the clock gate let us peer into the damaged fragility of an embattled and beaten man. His blog post comment showed us a sad vision of a man who just can’t get anything right, even when it is beyond his control.

It’s not such a big deal on the Blue Jackets overall season as that was determined by early November, but to think that a team’s rink managment can affect a game and a potential play off berth for a team in April is sad.

Bruce McGee: A). I really think people need to learn the phrase shit happens. Let’s say the NHL tried to do something about this after the game was over. Does anyone really think it would of made the situation better? I understand why the Columbus GM was upset, but in my mind shit likes this happens to everyone eventually. There would be more harm in trying to monkey with rules etc to try and prevent it.

ThatDamnDoubleC A). It’s the Columbus Blue Jackets, who gives a fuck? Not even Blue Jackets fans could give a fuck about the Blue Jackets. Anyways, for fair play, let’s see what those two points would’ve done for Columbus’ season.. they currently have 45 points from 64 games as I type this, and by adding those two points, they would have 47 points from 64 games, which would put them a full 9 points behind Edmonton in last place in the NHL. You know you’re rubbish when you’re behind Edmonton in the standings. However, if we take two points away from the Dallas Stars division rival Los Angeles Kings, we see that it would put them three points behind Dallas, as opposed to the one they are now. So not only, did it cost the Crap Jackets two points, but it could cost the Stars a playoff berth, and if it does that, then I will hate Drew Doughty. But for now, good play by Doughty to keep his eye on the puck and the game, and a big HAHA! to the Crap Jackets for taking their eye off it.. there’s a reason you’re last, and it’s not just because you want the #1 overall pick. Is Nail Yakupov that good Columbus?

G: This is a very relevant issue, considering the outcome. Had no goal been scored, perhaps not so much, but that goal could literally make the difference in the standings determining which teams make the post season. Clearly, the Blue Jackets will not be playing for Lord Stanley’s cup… but what if the Kings make it past another team by one point to clutch the eighth seed? If such is the case, and I was a fan of the team the Kings’ leapfrogged over to secure that spot, I would be irate. In order to rectify this situation, the league needs to address which piece of technology takes precedence in this clock blunder. I don’t understand how they can not simply be synched to each other, so that in the case of human error, a simple instant replay can be used to make a conclusive decision.



Pictured above is a man who might have a problem picking up the ladies for a while.



Question 2: B). Helmet-Gate… On January 17, 2012, Edmonton Oiler, Taylor Hall collided with team mates during the pre-game warm up skate. During the scuffle, Hall’s face was lacerated by a skate, and opened the flood gates among the media about whether players should wear helmets during all points of the game. Granted, it was a scary moment as the skate nearly caught Hall in the eye, which would be a potentially career ending injury. As pundits discussed it the following evening on TSN, camera’s caught Scott Gomez of the Montreal Canadiens taking a puck off the back of the head during the pre-warm up skate. He was forced to leave the ice, change his jersey, and have his head looked at. No, he was not wearing a helmet.

Armchair MVP: Irrelevant. It was a freak accident, these things happen. Maybe players should be wearing helmets in warm-up just in case, but unless a rule is made, I doubt many of the players in the league are going to suddenly start wearing helmets in warmups, even if it is a good idea. It took a guy dying (Bill Masterson) to even make helmets mandatory in games.

ThinkSoJoE: B).—Didn’t Spezza get caught with a puck during practice too, just after the Taylor Hall ordeal? Look, the fact of the matter is that helmets are a piece of safety equipment. If you’re not out there without your shoulder pads, your hockey pants, your elbow pads, gloves, and everything else, why are you going without a helmet, especially when concussions are a very serious issue these days?—————————————————————————————————————

G: It’s bad enough it happened to one of my team’s guys, but in a way that is easily prevantable. Had that skate been a little closer down Hall’s face, his career may have been cut short or lost sight in one eye.
I get it. You want to skate around before the game with you hair waving for all the pretty girls in the audience… not so pretty now, are you, huh Taylor? This is a common sense thing. There are some teams that have made helmets mandatory in the pre-skate prior the “Helmetgate” incident. If I was a GM of a team, especially in hindsight of what happened to one of a team’s future (and a number one draft pick, mind you), I would follow the lead and make this compulsory. No debate, no discussion. I’d also demand the guys wear visors too. There’s just too much at stake, and money for that matter. It’s hard enough to prevent ridiculous injuries as it is. You can’t go and ban pancakes just because Dustin Penner sustained an injury eating them… but seriously, this seems like common sense to me at this point. What really got to me, was the following night on TSN’s “That’s Hockey”, they kept showing footage of all the early games preskates, noting who was and wasn’t wearing a helmet.

BaptisBlacktick:HELMET GATE:
Corey Potter is probably a bigger risk to his team than the flu.
I hope Taylor opts next season for a Viktor Von Doom mask.
Freak accident, let the team decide what path they’ll take, I think the coaches are at a bigger risk of injury if this season shows us anything (Todd McLellan, Brent Sutter, Ass hat ex Leafs coach Ronnie all took pucks to the head this season, should they wear helmets now?

Bruce McGee: B). Look there is nothing wrong with being protected at all times while on the ice. That said no matter how hard you try to protect players accidents are going to happen. Unless we put them all in bubble boy suits. Which would be awesome for about 5 minutes. I think the players should be allowed to handle this issue and mother NHL should stay the hell out of it. If it were me I would wear a helmet all the time on the Ice. I think back to the awesome old ad for Bell Helmets(motor cycle) . If you have a five dollar head wear a five dollar helmet. It applies here.

ThatDamnDoubleCB). For starters, I know who the TSN pundits are, and I’m pretty sure James Duthie is around there somewhere. I have my eye on you Duthie, whether or not I like you, depends on how serious you take your Twitter. As for Taylor Hall, are the Oilers that good, that they collide with their own players during warm-up? Not even the Crap Jackets do that. So you deserve to have your face near cut in half Taylor Hall, for the simple fact that you collided with a team-mate during pre-game warm up. As for Scott Gomez, I applaud the person who hit him. Do you know how hard it wouild be to hit someone in the back of the head with a puck at any distance? The person who hit him should be pushed up the lines to be the first line sniper with that accuracy. But it’s not helmets that’s the problem, it’s wearing helmets that’s the problem. Remember Richard Zednik nearly being decapitated in a game against the Buffalo Sabres on February 10 2008? He was wearing a helmet at the time, and the helmet did nothing to protect him. Should I blame the helmet? Should I blame Matt Cooke, because everyone blames Matt Cooke? Should I blame Olli Jokinen, who thought tripping his own players would be a good idea? Should I blame Todd Bertuzzi because everyone blames Todd Bertuzzi? Should I blame the Sabres, because if they’re not whinging about a skate in the crease, they’re involved in the art of decapitation? Should I blame Sean Avery because everybody blames Sean Avery? None of those. I blame.. Steve Moore. Why? For being soft. He laid out Markus Naslund, and got no penalty. Bertuzzi was only looking out for his team-mate. Steve Moore is as big as thug as Bertuzzi was.

Wait… What? Instead of Ovechkin we get Drake? Are you kidding? Terrible… This guy should be suspended for 82 games AND the All Star game forever. Make it happen, Shanahan.



Question 2: C). Alexander Ovechkin snubs the All Star Game. After being suspended for three games after “launching head shot” on Zybnek Michalek of the Pittsburgh Penguins on January 23rd, Ovechkin announced the following Tuesday he would opt out of the All Star Game the following Sunday. The suspension did indeed overlap the All Star Game. This in turn, opened the debate whether a suspended player, all star or not, should also be denied the opportunity in NHL related special events while serving a suspension.

Armchair MVP: Relevant. I don’t know how many people watch the game, and of those, I don’t know how many are fans who know a few of the league’s biggest stars, but not much beyond that. All of those fans just lost a significant part of their reason to watch the game, because Ovechkin always knows how to play to the crowd in these kind of events.

G: While I understand that there are probably a lot of Ovechkin haters out there that might think this was just in spite of his suspension (and it is entirely possible that it was), there is much more to this than that. Considering how the shoot-out competition is become the must-see event during the All Star Weekend, perhaps even more so than the game itself, and Ovechkin has been leading the pack for creativity, there is a potential for a big payday for a highlight reel endorsement deal. Much like the slam dunk competition in the NBA.
With that said, it brings up the issue of a suspension and “special games.” Sure this is not a regular season or playoff game, it is showcase of the best players for the fans. However, how better to punish a cheap shot, head targetting, or dirty player? Take away the opportunity to participate in the event as part of the punishment. I don’t care who that player is, to me it’s the principle of reinforcing the idea of cleaning up the game. It should not count as a part of the games suspended either. Those should stand. I would argue that if you have committed a severe violation of the NHL’s rules, or found a loop hole within the rules that still warrents Shanahan to Shanaban you, you should also be excluded from all things related to your team and the game as well. You are suspended. The only exception for me, would be for events or appearances of a non-monetary sort such as charity work.
I think Ovechkin opened a Pandora’s box, whether he truly meant to or not. His excuse to not go should be the rule, and not the exception. He shouldn’t have even had the choice to go, rather, by default not be allowed to go. It’s just one little thing, but something I think would help progress the sport away from the chronic issue of taking liberties and concussions.

ThatDamnDoubleCC). The All-Star game should count in suspensions, what are you mad? That’s like saying that you’re suspended, but you can play this game because you were good enough. No, if he was good enough, he wouldn’t of gotten suspended in the first place. Just like any award that rewards the fairest and best player should never be awarded to a person who has been suspended for that season, due to the fact that he was so unfair at a time, that he couldnt play because of it. Alex O is just a sook. A frustrated sook. Go lose your virginity already Ovie. I’m sure your overpaid millions can buy you some prostitutes in Washington. I would tell you to come to Dallas, but then you would be shown up by Radek Dvorak. That’s right AlexO, you’re not even as good as Radek fucking Dvorak. How does that make you feel? I don’t care, go whine some more you fucking sook.

ThinkSoJoE: C). Ovie actually pulled out of the game on his own, stating that he felt that since he was suspended he shouldn’t participate in the All-Star Game. I would’ve done the same thing, though I’m very sure the league would have let him play regardless, especially with Crosby still battling his injuries from last season.
ThinkSoJoE: D). $7.4 Million and you’re expected to score goals? Shocking. A scoring drought is one thing, but somebody locked this dude in a scoring deprivation chamber. Think of all the players who have scored goals in the 365 days that Gomez didn’t. How many of these players are AHL or CHL players called up to cover an injury? Gomez has been an NHL caliber player for many years, and with that comes a certain expectation. Can’t blame the Habs fans for scrutinizing the guy.

Bruce McGee: C). I am sure the irrational haters had a bloody field day with this. While I have no doubt this was a giant up yours to the NHL, as far as I’m concerned, if Ovie didn’t want to go then he shouldn’t of gone. The suspension was justified and technically he was just complying with the rules.

BaptisBlacktick:OVECHKIN GATE:

The All Star game is such a godamned bore, who can blame him? Seriously though, he’s a bit of a dick to not take part and be there for the kids entertainment. As it’s not a game, he should be there; if anything, it’s a bigger punishment to have to go. (Or at least watch it.)


At least Devin Setoguchi scored the game tying goal to give us this epic (possibly the worst shoot-out blunder ever).



Question 2: D). On Thursday, February 9th, Scott Gomez scored a goal against Evgeni Nabokov and the New York Islanders. The $7.4 million dollar “sniper” ended a scoring dought at just over 365 days, tallying the 168th goal of his career. The website didgomezscore.com immediately posted a page stating “Yes!” after the goal. Montreal fans are some of the most dedicated of any sport on the planet, and he has received much scrutiny for his lack of finding the back of the net.

Montreal press are ruthless, his contract is brutal, his performance is terrible, but it’s happening to the Habs and those dicks can eat it.

Bruce McGee: D). Scott Gomez is still in the league? who knew?

G: A small part of me is amused by Gomez’ drought. They is making a ridiculous amount of money to do precisely that… score goals and be an offensive threat. Granted, there is much value in a playmaker putting up assist numbers, but in all fairness, he was exactly lighting up the score sheet in that area either. It’s pretty terrible to have so much money tied up in the guy for Montreal. The kicker is, is that no team is as much under the media and fan microscope than Habs. Hockey is almost literally a religion there. With that being said, there are also few players with the poise and class that could put up with such scrutiny and keep a smile on his face. I have to give Gomez that, because I can think of plenty of prima donnas who I doubt could follow suit. Can you imagine how Patrick Kane would react? Or how about Ovechkin (whose numbers are less than stellar for him this season)?

ThinkSoJoE: D). $7.4 Million and you’re expected to score goals? Shocking. A scoring drought is one thing, but somebody locked this dude in a scoring deprivation chamber. Think of all the players who have scored goals in the 365 days that Gomez didn’t. How many of these players are AHL or CHL players called up to cover an injury? Gomez has been an NHL caliber player for many years, and with that comes a certain expectation. Can’t blame the Habs fans for scrutinizing the guy.

Armchair MVP: Relevant. He was my punchline. Now I need to actually get some good material.

ThatDamnDoubleCD). You know who the first person Scott Gomez thanked after he scored the goal? The guy who hit him in the back of the head during pre-game warm ups earlier in the year. It knocked some sense into him, and he remembered how to score goals again. Maybe he has trouble finding the back of things in more than just the hockey rink? Maybe he’s had trouble finding the Russian hooker’s vagina he paid for? Maybe he’s had trouble remembering that he didn’t play for the Crap Jackets he sucked so bad? Scott Gomez would go close to having the best money to goal ratio this year, at $3.7 million per goal scored. Nice work Scotty G. Maybe that’s why Montreal traded away Kostitsyn, now that Scott Gomez is back to his sniping, goal scoring ways. Those Montreal guys might be dedicated, but it’s not because they’re better than Edmonton or Toronto. It’s because they’re in French Canada, and you know what that means don’t you?
There’z no Canada like French Canada, it’z za bezt Canada in ze land.
Ze ozer Canada is hardly Canada. If you lived here for a day, you’d understand.
There’z no Canada like French Canada, it’z za bezt Canada in ze land.
And ze ozer Canada is a bullshit Canada. If you lived here for a day, you’d understand.
I think you’d understand. …You understand.



“Trash Talk”


All this season, the PUCK YOU! crew have participated in an NHL fantasy pool on Yahoo Sports. If you would like to see who we drafted and how we are doing, click here.

While the Yahoo system has it’s own regular season and playoff format that divides the actual NHL regular season, there is no definitive winner as of yet. The pack has clearly been separated into to halves, and the top spot has traded hands a number of times. Our own trade deadline is March 8, 2012. The final three weeks of the regular season will determine our playoff champion in which all 8 of us will have the chance to claim the prize. But until then, we are in the final stretch to determine our own President’s Trophy winner. While this pool is still up for grabs, do you have any “special” messages you’d like to send out to your current opponent and/or the whole pool in general?

ThatDamnDoubleC Playing For The Playoffs.. Fuck The Regular Season..

ThinkSoJoE: I can’t seem to get out of fourth place. Oh well. See you bitches in the playoffs!

G: This is far from over Bruce. The guy who passed by the real champion, me, has no talk? Oh dude, be ready, because I’m coming for you. I will not die. I’m like Matt Hardy without the weirdness, drug abuse, and terrible inclination to destroy any integrity I have left online. Actually, I’m nothing like Matt Hardy. I’m more like The Rock. Skates to asses. Team Bring It. Once this pool is over, I’m back to Hollywood because I’m never leaving. Never… ever… again! Wait, what? What in the blue hell am I talking about? You don’t know either? Fuck. I’m taking both the regular season AND the playoffs. Fuck all of you. Smiley face.

BaptisBlacktick:And sorry to all in the pool, I don’t mean to be mailing it in, but my ADD makes me forget my futility, however |’m impressive in my other pool, ask G I beat him in that one 7-4 hahahahaahahahaha.



Hockey fans! We want to hear from you. The point of this panel is to allow fans to chime in, not the professionals. You pay their salaries, so tell them what YOU think below in the comments section.

Here at Wonderpod Online, we encourage discussion and celebrate debate. The internet can be stifling for some, but we prefer to open our doors to authors and writers from elsewhere to come on board in our panels and discuss passions that might not be represented at their other homes. With that being said, we hope hockey fans are enjoying the regular season up to this point in time.

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Shameless Plugs!


Some of our panelists write elsewhere on the internet, and we’d like you to check out some of their websites!

Bored Wrestling Fan
A break down of various professional wrestling programs and events from the eyes of the smarky fan

The Cultural Revolution (TCR Comix)
Al Creed’s comics dominate tongue and cheek humour here

A weekly podcast about the world of video games, from player experiences to current events in the industry, Bruce McGee, Pat Man, and Gun Sage provide insight into the medium for any gamer (whether casual or “pro”).

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